The Met Gala red carpet is basically a mosh pit of reporters yelling and waving their microphones in the air while celebrities shuffle about and try not to sound dumb when they answer questions about their horrendously uncomfortable but hopefully fabulous outfits. As you can imagine, this leads to ridiculous quotes, and makes the witty ones that much more impressive. Below, a roundup of our favorites from last night, reported straight from the front lines.
Debbie Harry: “I’m not really a punk. I’m just a schmuck, so! It’s more like a philosophy than anything else. Anybody can be a punk, and usually some of us are, some of the time. I don’t know what I’m saying, honestly. It’s too late for me. But Kanye is coming, and he’s one of the biggest punks in the world. Didn’t he hop on stage at some awards thing? That’s pretty punk. I hope he jumps up on me!”
Jessica Seinfeld: “Nose rings? No. We’re Jewish.”
Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld.
Jimmy Fallon: “I don’t have a tattoo, because it’s too permanent, and one day it’ll look like a French fry. You get Bart Simpson, skateboarding, saying ‘Don’t have a cow, man,’ but when you’re 70 years old it’ll say going to say ‘rgadgkhlaskdfha’ and no one is going to know. And you’re going to have to explain who the Simpsons were. [Reporter asks why he has a Band-Aid on his nose.] I got in a fight on my way here. No, actually, I dropped an iPhone on my face. I was reading my e-mail in bed.”
Jimmy Fallon and Nancy Juvonen.
Joseph Altuzarra: “I used to wear one dangly earring, like a pirate. A very gay pirate.”
Allison Williams and Joseph Altuzarra.
Allison Williams: “The most rebellious thing I’ve ever done? Well, when glitter was really big, like when Limited Too and Claire’s were a real thing, I wasn’t allowed to wear glitter out of the house. So I’d put it in my backpack and I’d put it on in the bus. Once my mom surprised me at school and found me covered in glitter. I also used to lie. I lied that grandmother was dead once and she was not! That was pretty rebellious.”
Giovanna Battagalia: “I’m not a punk girl myself, so I made a crown out of safety pins. I feel like I have a pin in my brain right now, but hopefully the pain will go away in a few hours! Champagne, no pain.”
Tom Ford: “The best use of a safety pin? I keep my fly closed. It doesn’t always work, though.”
Joan Smalls and Tom Ford.
Ken Downing: “I loved a good mosh pit. I’ll mosh with anyone who’s adorable. This is an awfully attractive crowd, so I will give equal opportunity moshing to anyone here tonight.”
Barry Diller: “I’m not channeling punk. I’m channeling my wife [Diane Von Furstenberg]. Look at her! She has pink hair! I think it actually looks ridiculous.”
Barry Diller and Diane Von Furstenberg.
Reed Krakoff: “I had a bad punk phase. I dyed the front of my hair blond in high school. It was a mistake. My brother threatened to sit on my chest and cut it out of my hair. But I loved it. I was inspired to do it after the first girl I ever dated left me for the drummer from Flock of Seagulls. They were playing at the Peppermint Lounge and I came into New York with her. She stayed behind with Ali, the drummer, and I never saw her again. So I figured I’d better look more like him.”
Psy: “I am the only one wearing color, so I’m feeling awkward right now. Everyone else is wearing black. It’s a little embarrassing.”